Poems I wrote at Reasons~

This picture was taken last night! I have been so broke these days and got a 10 dollar Kohls card in the mail so said "why not". This dress was originally 68 as it has added toulle underneath and solid material. It was on clearance for 13 and I used the card! A 3 dollar dress! Hope I will be daring enough to actually wear it as I can add sandals to make it casual or add a little coat and fancier shoes for a job I hope to get soon! Recovery is a hard process when you still see fat and have to gain! I am blessed with an incredible therapist and dietician as well as friends and family support though not always easy to share what's going on~

Here's a funny poem I wrote while at Reasons because of some of the "rules" and things we had to do. I would always crack up when a staff would call us all to go to the cafeteria and say "is everyone ready for lunch" etc. I would think "duh", of course we don't want to eat, but would always shout real loud "yay food can't wait". Gotta have a sense of humor. lol The director has it framed in her office and even showed her boss who loved it!

~Reasons~

Reasons is the place to be,

When we need those calories.

Starch, fat, protein, fruit galore,

Keeps us coming back for more!

Sound off

Food’s fun

Sound off

You’re not done!

We love to eat 6 times a day,

Then sit in groups, no time to play.

No exercise, no naps allowed,

We have to make our therapists proud!

Sound off

Food’s fun

Sound off

You’re not done!

We have to count when we pee,

Watched every moment, no privacy.

If food is left we must not boast,

‘Cause we must boost and make a toast!

Sound off

Food’s fun

Sound off

You’re not done!

So do recovery and do not part,

Surrender to Reasons and make a start.

Enjoy the food, the staff, the scale,

You will go far you will not fail!

Sounds offFood’s fun

Sound offYou are done!

6-02-09
~Thank you Dr. Lisa and staff for saving my life and putting me on the road to life…Recovery~

This next one a little rough but harder to write with more emotion behind it. Never said I was a great poet! lol But gotta risk!

Good bye Ana, Hello Recovery…

I hate good byes and miss you so,

I can’t have you and recover, so you must go.

For 20 years I leaned on you for support,

The false security you gave I must abort.

You teased me with temptation, telling me I would feel thin,

You made me feel I would reach my goal weight and actually

win.

But what you really gave me was failing health and isolation,

A loneliness that killed me inside and caused false

stabilization.

You screamed at me to take the pills, starve, and exercise,

You will be thin, do not compromise.

So I took your lead as you took control,I abused my body and

did as you told.

I never gave up on you as you screamed I see fatness,

I drove myself to near insanity to rid the sadness.

It was never enough to get you to see,

I kept trying to please you to get rid of me.

Your sense of false security has caused so much pain,

My life has been lived in misery and will never be the same.

I nearly died, giving up my life to you,

For what I don’t know because you are the fool.

I am taking my life back one small step at a time,

It will be me who screams at you back off I’m fine.

I will no longer listen, I hate what you’ve done,

I will now listen to recovery which I have won.

So here’s to good byes I don’t need your strife,

Recovery has taken your place to give me life.

I am no longer alone in misery to mope,

Recovery is genuine and gives me a great sense of hope!
6-25-09